My ultimate ambition is to write a Bollywood Movie. I’ve been working on scripts for several years, and here, for your reading pleasure, is my latest script.
Rich Heroine is in love with poor Hero. But dad doesn’t agree because Hero is poor.
Hero wins lottery, asks Heroine & her dad to get lost, goes partying with friends to Goa instead.
At the party, Hero meets Heroine#2, and they fall in love.
Love song shot at Niagara falls.
At the end of the song, Hero trips over his shoelace and falls into the Niagara falls.
Heroine#2 says “bummer!” and finds another Hero #2.
Hero #2′s mom doesn’t like Heroine#2, threatens to kill her.
Hero #2′s mom gives supari to gundas , gives them their photo, asks gundas to kill Heroine #2.
Big bad gundas chase Hero#2.
Car chase through the streets of Shanghai.
Hero#2′s car gets punctured. Gunda catches up with Hero#2, but realizes the girl is not with Hero#2 in the car.
Head gunda apologizes for wasting Hero#2′s time. Hero#2 and Head gunda exchange business cards and leave.
Hero#1 (who fell into Niagara falls) has been reborn and now is the Villan.
Villan kidnaps Heroine#2.
Villan asks Hero#2 to bring the Diamonds to his hideout at 6PM if he wants to see Heroine#2 alive.
Hero#2 has to watch TV serial at 6PM (Koffee With Karan), so tells the police to go instead.
Police arrive at the hideout early, at 4PM.
Nothing is happening, so Police get bored and leave.
Meanwhile, Heroine #2 and Villan have fallen in love. They decide to get married.
Villan calls Hero #2 to tell him change of plans, but Hero #2 is not answering his phone.
Hero#2 arrives at the hideout at 7:30PM after the TV show, apologizes for being late. He’s got everyone Chocolate Cake to make it up.
Item song featuring Rakhee Savant. Shot in Switzerland.
Villan asks Hero #2 for the Diamonds.
Hero #2 says he thought the Villan said Almonds, and has brought 2 sacks.
Villan gets angry, asks his Head gunda to kill Hero#2.
Hero#2 recognizes Head gunda from the car chase, asks “How’s life?”, makes small talk.
Head gunda and Hero#2 discover they both love rock music.
They go off and form a rock band. Villan and Heroine #2 get married.
Everyone lives happily ever after.
I wanted to call the movie “Mein Kahan Hoon?“, but now I think “Mein tere bacche ke maa banane wali hoon!” sounds better.
So, do you think my movie will be a hit?